Twilight series *contains spoilers*

[Roark]

Borrowed the series from my wife. I'm halfway through the 4th book.

BELLA: I'm so sad.
EDWARD: Heyyy...
BELLA: You are a dracula.
EDWARD: I love you.
BELLA: I love you.
EDWARD: You cut yourself on a paper envelope. I'm so sorry that I exposed you to such danger by giving you said envelope.
BELLA: No, it's not your fault at all. I'm sorry for needing an envelope, which led you to feel guilty for giving it me.
EDWARD: I love you, but I have to leave. I can't afford for you to hurt yourself like this again.
JACOB: I love you too! Hang out with me.
BELLA: I'm so sad, but I sort of love you too.
JACOB: I are a werewolf now. How cool is that!
BELLA: It's cool, but I love the dracula more.
EDWARD: I'm back now. Marry me.
BELLA: Make me a dracula.
EDWARD: Marry me and I'll make you a dracula.
BELLA: *is pregnant with half-dracula*
JACOB: #$%& you, half-dracula!
BELLA: *is a dracula now and gives birth to abomination*
JACOB: I am now in love with your 3 day old infant.
ROARK: *halfway through 4th book*

Preposterous.

[Miss Yvonne]

I've never been into the draculas. Even back when people were reading the Brad Pitt dracula books.

Have you had to sit through the films?

[ReverseEngineer]

Even back when people were reading the Brad Pitt dracula books.

[Mr John]

*feels need to scream*

[crotchgrabber]

i think this sums it up perfectly:

http://theoatmeal.com/story/twilight

[Roark]

*feels need to scream*

[Miss Yvonne]

i think this sums it up perfectly:

http://theoatmeal.com/story/twilight

[Grotocult]

I'm not reading all of...